How deep is your Love ?

I do not exactly remember when and why I wrote this article. But today, casually going through the archives, I found this on my Drive. And while re-reading it, a thought came crashing to my mind like a bird crashing through an aeroplane’s engine – resulting in a blast and then ultimately, failure. Similarly, this article punctured my mind in a way I couldn’t bear. I have always advocated emotional and psychological faculties over the pragmatic ones, but today, I am at a place where I can not be emotionally available to anyone anymore. 

It is not because I have loved and lost, but perhaps because I do not want to lose anymore now.
This article, which was once written by me, is now helping me understand myself in strange ways. When I think and reflect on my journey so far, I feel why it is so hard and nearly impossible for me to be liked and loved by anyone or vice versa. But, this article gave me a reason. 

Now, I am not a feminist, not even remotely related to the term, but I believe this will help not just women, but also men understand why they are alone and stuck with the ominous title “single”. 

The reason is – Depth. The depth is not a metaphor here. It is real. Depth of your heart, your thoughts and your spirituality. The deeper you are rooted spiritually and emotionally, the more difficult it is for shallow people to dive deep into you or to let them dig deeper into them. And in my opinion one should not even try hard to do that.

The deeper you are, the harder it becomes for you to find someone who wants to have a relationship with you. You can go out on a lot of dates but at some point the relationship fails to progress any further and that is mainly because of the intensity of your depth. Not every man is strong enough to handle a deep woman and vice versa. Here’s why:

1. A deep person asks deep questions. A deep person will probe further into your life and ask questions that you may not be prepared to answer. They will never enjoy a shallow conversation.

2. They are honest. Too honest – often blunt. A deep person takes their integrity seriously and one thing they believe in is honesty.

3. A deep person knows what she wants. Or who they want. A deep person knows right away if they like you and doesn’t need to date around or explore her other options to be sure of their feelings. Their hearts only beat for a special few people and they know them right away.

4. They want a deep relationship. They want long conversations about your life, they want to hear stories about your past, they want to understand your pain and they want to add value to your life. They want a real relationship that goes beyond going out and having fun.

5. A deep person is not afraid of intimacy. They are not afraid of getting closer or risking getting hurt in the process. They don’t think it will entrap their freedom or make them vulnerable. Their depth and intimacy go hand in hand and they will always cherish the beauty of intimacy in relationships.

6. A deep person sees through you. They can see who you really are and what makes you vulnerable. They are not the ones to hold back from pointing out what they see in you or how well they can read you. Even though it makes you uncomfortable, they want you to know that they understand you and that you can be yourself around them.

7. This kind of person craves consistency. They get turned off by inconsistency or flaky behaviour. They desire a strong connection and a solid bond and they know that consistency is the foundation of that bond. 

8. A deep person is intense. They may be slightly intimidating because they bring intensity to everything they do. Their emotions are intense and so are their thoughts. They will never be indifferent about things that matter to them – not everyone is strong enough to handle their intensity.

9. Most importantly, a deep person won’t wait for you. They will not wait for you to make up your mind or watch you be hesitant about them. They are strong and passionate and will not waste their emotions on someone who doesn’t appreciate their depth. Even though they are looking for a special kind of connection and bond, a deep person is not afraid of being on their own.

4 thoughts on “How deep is your Love ?

  1. Dear Samina W.

    I was very surprised to found out that many “strange” features of deep relationship are gethered under one description – “How deep is your love”.

    The article is wonderful in its matter and subject.

    You have written an article which really gives the essence of relationship.

    Liked by 1 person

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